The BIG D- Diseases and Difference
I always preferred companionship over isolation. However, the solitude and social stigmatizations attached to diseases and the individual’s living with them never ceases to amaze me. Diseases make us different and difference is difficult to embrace. Through-out time we destroy difference. My question is, “Why? Why is different so scary for us?”
Most of my cancer journey I chose to hide. I was a criminal, violating the laws of the Nation. I had no medical or Naturopathic supervision. The few friends of came around in the beginning, when I was a beginning Survivor, but that dwindled over the years. It takes time to survive cancer and more time to live with and manage cancer, and..., with gratitude my story continues on.
I selected some pretty unusual treatments for my cancer back then in 2007, including oxygen, enzymes and marijuana. I used all my savings up until I had nothing left but my life and my car. Whenever I could I told people my story. From
to Connecticut, from Florida
to Arizona I
shared what I was doing. I was told I would die, I was told I was crazy, I was
shunned and shamed for ten years.
Now I am able to receive a $200.00 month Food Stamp allotment and the State’s support for the unending dental repairs from radiation damage. I knew I was one of the lucky ones who, through grace, survived the disease and stayed out of prison. Many did not. At any time, I could have easily died or been thrown into prison for violating the federal Schedule 1 drug laws. Being shunned and shamed took secondary place. In place of my emotional and mental healing, was my physical healing, keeping myself alive and out of prison. That was my priority.
Several decades of Pink-washing profits increase, as more and cancers erupt and this in turn has created an enormous, unstoppable and very hungry industrial/medical beast. Many know the truth but they are not ready to cause any undue alarms in the general population. Besides, we have nothing to replace the system with and the argument stands.
After ten years of my hiding, the shift towards Alternative healing has opened up some. More and more people who have been hidden away have surfaced. The Medical Marijuana industry is taking shape against the resistance of many. And it is just beginning. State after State opens up to new medical marijuana dispensaries and medical marijuana patient increase increases. A few have already legalized recreational marijuana and the 2016 Presidential election is a pivoting mechanism still awaiting an answer in the Fall election.
In my State, the winners of the
spent a non-refundable exorbitant amount just to enter. Only a few could win.
What a load of upfront money from the beginning, I thought. Where does this
money go? Who is profiting and who is benefitting? Marijuana
Medical marijuana was an out-of-pocket expense for the patient and the stigma attached to using plant-based medicine furthers the shame of those suffering with diseases who are legally allowed a certain amount every month.
I had no desire to end up in the Federal pen so I registered with the State. I had my medical marijuana photo taken and an identification MMP card provided for me to carry as proof and protection. As long as we obeyed the restrictions for the use of the product we were safe from criminal prosecution. That’s what we all thought.
Even though it took a year to provide the product to the patient, the State turned its head against the sources of distribution. It took over a year before a legal dispensary was in place. It did not matter where we got marijuana as long as we had a card. As you can imagine, that caused a lot of confusion for everyone involved.
The collective consciousness is shifting. The smart and wealthy people have begun to build the Big business of marijuana. The drug cartel’s have a new enemy.
legally growing and distributing marijuana. As the industry grows its’ Mom and
Pop origins die and its’ Green Emerald Triangle farmers die with it. Big FDA,
Food and Drug and Agriculture regulated industries like pharmaceutical and
tobacco, the seed/patent ownership is now in place for the future control of
When I started purchasing medical marijuana from the local pharmacy/dispensary, barely anyone showed up and everyone was really sick and really uneasy. Camera’s are tucked away in every corner of the building both inside and outside. All the glass is bullet-proof and there are no windows on the building. Inside there are layers of glass and walls which lead into the restricted back rooms. No one is allowed in without a card and extra identification. No marijuana plants are visible. The pharmacist’s wear white robes and all the marijuana is packaged and identified with microchip tracking from the growers. Every product is sealed in containers and presented similar to a pharmaceutical. Only certain diseases are allowed the use of medical marijuana. The list continues to grow as the push for legalization of marijuana for recreational use continues to gain momentum.
Inside the pharmacy, people of all ages suffering with their maladies count the money they are able to scrounge up, from wherever they can just to buy some medicine product. The product is very expensive and not covered by any Insurance. it causes people much hardship in order to obtain it. It is an out-of pocket expanse for the patient and leaves the person in greater financial hardship.
I had no money left by the time medical marijuana became available for me. Like many, I thought of turning to the street just to turn a profit. Many people wanted the product and had the money to give to a person who could legally obtain it. The disease requirements kept expanding and people knew people who had access to purchase the products. They may be suffering and they had some money. What to do?
A pattern we already had seen with corn, wheat and milk, with the GMO’S, pesticides and herbicides. I wondered if legalizing would corrupt the plant, the flower and the healing properties of the plant as it became more and more cloned and processed in mass production. Was there was another way to grow our own marijuana plants and still maintain a marijuana industry? Legal marijuana is a proven, profitable cash business. But, when profits rule something nefarious always seems to happen. Like a demon from the dark, it appears out of nowhere and rises up as a force to be reckoned with. We can feel the rumbles of the thunder before we see the flashes of the light and there is no way to stop the force.
The moment I chose non-compliance with the traditional, medical Standard of Care treatments for my cancer, everything changed. It was a very risky choice back then. Now, ten years later, it still very risky, but now it seems more people are willing to take the risk. I wondered if my choice played a role and set into motion a pebble that reverberated energetically so others could choose different because choice matters.
I thought the issue around marijuana would ethically and theologically resolve itself as we became more loving and compassionate with one another. Indeed, it was very risky, very political and very potentially life and liberty threatening then and it still is now.
I lived in a time where the world was divided over the use of marijuana for medical care and marijuana for recreational use. We make wars out of everything we don’t like, we don’t understand and we want to destroy. We went from the war on drugs to drug wars to drugs for warfare to the war on cancer. Until the powers of control, it is uncontrollable.
Ever since I ventured into the alternative world my life changed, my friends changed and fear shadowed. Not knowing who to trust, I pretty much trusted no one. I knew I couldn’t trust the medical doctors, but my friends? Could I trust them? Was it worth the risk to trust anyone? I wanted to keep my faith in people because time and belief created new life.